|Modern Day Practice by Heather Landis|
One of the things we're dealing with right now is the whole "we have no idea what's wrong" situation, because finding out what's wrong seems to be a moving target, and and it's an expensive one.
Rundown of a conversation I had with the doctor's office:
Me: I need to know how much this test will cost me in the event nothing is covered by insurance.
Receptionist: Well, the test is $732, and the accompanying doctor's appointment is $132, but those aren't counting any anesthetics or medical equipment that might be used. One woman's test ended up costing her $1600.
Me: So, somewhere between $900 and $1600. Okaaaay.
I understand that things happen during appointments, but to have such a scary-big range for a test that does not actually *do* anything beyond maybe provide answers (either, "there is something wrong, here it is!" or "there is nothing wrong with these bits of you, keep guessing! That'll be $1200!" or it could simple be, "there's nothing wrong with you, that'll be $300," which is a Big Difference)...it's a hard pill to swallow. I've done some digging and it *seems* like my insurance will cover the x-ray portion of the test, but nobody seems exactly sure what percentage of that cost the x-ray is. I contacted the special department the hospital has just for procedure cost estimates, and a few days later I got an estimate in the mail for....a children's feeding tube procedure, because for the second time, someone screwed up what I actually needed. I will probably be re-routing myself to a Charlottesville clinic once this procedure is over. Insert eyeroll to heaven. My eyes may never come down at this rate. ENJOY THE VIEW, EYES.
I went to the bookmarked adoption agency page and read the process over again. We could pay to create a dossier and application with that kind of money. We can't do a home study in our current house due to the lack of more than one bedroom, but we could get a piece of the initial pie out of the way with the dossier, I thought to myself. But what if the HSG dye test were to actually tell us the problem? What if it dislodged something microscopic and our problem was suddenly solved, as people say the test sometimes does? What if we don't sell our house fast and we're stretched thinner? What if we wait AGAIN to do this test and somebody we love DIES and then we have a kid who never gets to know them? I mean, really. Endless possibilities.
There is no right answer here. There is no clear path. We can't pick all of them -- we can't go the potential IVF route, have it fail, and then have money for adoption. Not easily, anyway. (Can anybody?) The main point here is, I feel like if anybody out there is stressing over what path to take, what road to embark down...don't feel bad that you can't go down both and you're stuck trying to figure out where your line in the sand is. You're not alone. It's maddening and it will leave you talking yourselves in circles if you try to come to the rational Best Choice, because It Does Not Seem To Exist.
Current decision procedure: homemade raspberry-basil popsicles + sitting on back stoop, circling and circling. Because what else can you do?